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How Do You Talk About Your Problems?

Updated: Oct 10, 2019

Checking the power in a car and how you talk about your problems
Diagnosing car issues the same way we diagnose our language

“My world is falling apart”, “I’m breaking down”, “I’m having a come-apart”, “I can’t handle one more thing” have all been part of our vocabulary at some point, right? Although these statements in themselves can seem like tip-of-the-tongue remarks, it’s important to look at them closer.

Have you ever had an autoimmune moment where you realize that your body was giving you signals that something was wrong, but you didn’t even notice? If you’ve done elimination diets, you become aware that a headache, fatigue, stomach pain, nausea aren’t actually random events. They mean something??!! Our language can be the same.

The way we express how we are doing often gives an indication of where we are at emotionally. There are emotions behind each of these that could be buried if they are not acknowledged. We can get caught up in running from these, trying to make them go away, reacting to them, that we forget to really listen to them and hear the message they are sending. They may be saying so much more than we realize.

When we are so used to thinking that we are just observers of our behavior, we may not even stop to realize what beliefs are actually driving our actions. When we can become aware of those thoughts and beliefs, we can hear them, analyze them, and change them to beliefs that may serve us better and be more accurate. Let’s look at a few examples:

“I’m breaking down”. Listen to that statement. What image does that bring to mind? If I could ask that person what image that brings to them, it could define a starting point. If she imagines herself trying to hold a heavy load of bricks and feeling as though she is about to get smashed under the pressure, I would start by asking questions: “What are you holding up?” “Is that yours to hold?” OFTEN, this indicates a boundaries issue in which someone is trying to manage things that are others’ responsibility, including how someone else thinks, feels, and acts.

If she were to imagine a car breaking down, I would begin to look at self-care. When a car begins to break down, there is often some wear-and-tear going on. Does she need to sleep more? How could she give herself some regular maintenance? Autoimmunity definitely shouts quickly when maintenance is required and reacts swiftly when we do not attend. One way or another, they body and the mind get the attention they need. Sometimes they shut the car down. Personally, I would rather schedule regular maintenance and hopefully head off a flare up.

If you are feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, worn-down, listen carefully to how you are speaking to yourself and others and then be willing to free yourself. Language will give a big clue as to where to start.

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