I believe you can change your past.
Whatever circumstances happened in the past truly do not have the ability to hurt you now.
If you are in pain about your past it is because of what you are believing about your past.
And you can change that.
Imagine having a life where your past has NO POWER over you today.
Mistakes, regrets, frustrations, betrayals that used to weigh you down become experiences that empower you, motivate you, that generate growth and gratitude and abundance.
It takes work to recognize what you are choosing to believe (usually accidentally) but it creates FREEDOM for your future.
It is worth the work.
I want to give you some of the exercises I use with clients that are suffering because of things that happened in their past to move forward with less effort and more joy.
Find where you are "past focused". Do you say things like, "This is just how I have always been", "That doesn't work for me. I've tried it", "The reason I'm like this, feeling like this, acting like this, is because of what happened in the past", "I'm not the kind of person who can do that", "This is just who I am". Ding, Ding, Ding! You are using evidence from your past to limit your future. It's okay because you can change it if you can see it. Start to say things like, "This is who I am now", "I take the effort to figure things out", "I'm the person who figures that out", "I am who I choose to be".
Write down the top 5 outcomes you would like in your life. Want a deeper spiritual connection with your Heavenly Father? A stronger body? A steamy relationship with your husband? An amazing mother? Now describe how you spent your time yesterday hour by hour. How much of that time was spend on things that contributed to your top 5 outcomes? When you are someone who looks to the future you are intentionally doing things to create new outcomes. Your past-focused mind will try to keep you where you have always been. In order to create new results you must THINK NEW THINGS about you are where you are going.
Forgive. Begin with yourself. One of the most powerful things I do with clients is help them rewrite their pasts. They take their darkest, most shameful, vulnerable moments and turn them into a story of power and strength. Sometimes they are scared to do this. They worry that if they accept or even embrace the person they were, they are condoning the behavior. They worry that they will be lying about their past or sugar-coating it. This is why we do this together. So I can help them through the resistance of forgiveness to free them from their painful stories so they can get out and do the beautiful things they are meant to do....using their experiences from the past to help them...not handicap them.
I would like to offer one action step to begin an incredible journey toward freedom from your painful past. Write a letter to your past self. Be honest. Be open to all of the feelings and open to receiving forgiveness even if you aren't ready to give it away just yet.
Forgiveness is like a stream. When you block off receiving you block off giving. The flow is interrupted.
So for now just receive. Start there. Receive forgiveness from yourself.
Dear (your name),
I'm angry because....
I'm sad because....
I'm sorry that...
I love you because....
There is so much more you can do to get past your past. Please reach DM me on Instagram to set up a call where you and I create a safe space to look at the things that are weighing you down and create a plan to cut them loose.
Hey!! Are you local?? We have a "Let Go" event coming up September 23rd 6-9. I will be teaching the mind work of letting go of the past, of grudges, resentment, hurt, and anger, we will do a "let go yoga flow", burning ritual by a bonfire under the stars, and more. Register by scanning the code below or clicking HERE.