Weekly Action Step
Action you can take today to improve your relationship.
Healthy Time Out
During your time out:
1. Ask yourself what you need to take care of yourself right now. Do you need food? A nap? Self-soothing? A warm blanket? A hug from yourself? Sunshine?
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2. Get it out. Write down all of the feelings and thoughts you are having so you don't feel the need to vomit them on your spouse.
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3. Remember the actual goal. As you move forward remember to focus your solutions on connection. You CAN stay connected and protected with excellent boundaries.
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4. When your mind goes to what they did, bring it back to what you can control; like how you can respond when they do that thing.
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5. Privately rehearse Terrance Real's feedback wheel:
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What I saw or heard
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What I made up about it
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How I feel about it
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What I'd like
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Let go of the outcome​
6. Decide how you will act during the upcoming conversation regardless of how they choose to show up. Generous? Patient? Calm? Empowering? Don't give that power or responsibility to anyone else but you.​
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